HOMELESS matter TO!!!!!!!
Feb 5, 2019
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9EO8kgCESkE

my heart when you see like the weather's
cold snowing and then you see like
homeless camps this breaks my heart good
morning and welcome to Monday it is a
fresh new week yeah yeah oh my gosh yes
we are on Monday
everybody I don't know why in this shirt
I feel like there's like these little
pokey things or something it's bugging
me and I don't know what is on it um yes
I have my shirt on
I just got back from counseling look
look I don't have enough to drink you
guys I got my sugar-free tea from Dutch
I have my tea and for everybody asking
what kind of tea is that I'm drinking my
husband said it is regular Lipton's tea
with milk a touch of sugar and that's it
that's it nothing else nothing special
and he uses the Lipton tea because he
makes it caffeine free for me cuz I
don't I try not to do caffeine so um
that is what the tea is spilling the tea
[Laughter]
anyways I just got back from counseling
I did not check in with you guys this
morning because my wonderful wonderful
husband took my a magnetic strip out of
the back of my phone and I couldn't hook
it to anything so I had to wait until I
came home um but counseling went really
so anyways I just want to say welcome to
all of you guys and your amazingness and
I will check in with you guys in a
little bit once I get these kids chilled
out
very well but it is
we're on our way up to Portland and self
corsets it snows more clothes they're up
here because they're closer to Mount
Hood and stuff so the temperatures drop
up here but yeah we start driving I was
like oh hey I think ACC know so
yes I don't like driving in it though I
don't care what kind of snow it is I do
not like driving in it so
I am just hoping that it just stays up
here until we get home and then if you
do whatever it wants to do
wonderful
and here I'm videoing this if you guys
some of you guys have snow up to your
nose tips but you know you've got to
love what you see
I really hope you guys are having a
Laureus when you see like the weather's
cold snowing and then you see like
homeless camps this breaks my heart I
wish that I had a way of being able to
help each and every one of them
it's just sad sad sad
as you know they're cold
[Music]
look at all this traffic
all right we just got anyways it
probably looks like I have not moved but
I promise I have we went to Portland and
came home and was stuck in traffic
because yeah there was snow and when
there's snow here in Oregon people drive
like morons I'm just like oh my gosh
like I mean of course we drive slower
and stuff like that but I mean so it
took us a little bit extra time to get
home but it was all right it was all
good it wasn't nothing like huge but ya
know um let's see oh look what I found
they were inside the book how I misplace
that I don't know but I did um what else
I am still drinking on my team we went
and stopped and got the kids Taco Bell
well Omar necessarily I didn't want it
um they were wanting burritos so and
it's so funny because as her nose going
up to Portland means she gets a burrito
wouldn't say where she got that from but
I think it was someone that name starts
with an M and ends with an M and I don't
know why but it's just a thing that I've
done that my kids now know when we go to
Portland they get Taco Bell but daddy
doesn't nobody use a car so they had to
wait until we came back into Salem grab
their food and run at home but they ate
their entire burrito I'm like where is
my children and then we're gonna
actually have Indian food tonight for
dinner so I love their chicken
so he's like do you want Indian food
dinner we just cuz we were out I mean
it's already 4:50 so I mean by the time
we would do something and cook it I was
like yeah that's fine I'm gonna sit down
tonight and work on a shopping list for
dinners I think on the list this time
I'm gonna put some stuff to make like
homemade bean burritos for the kids
because they love bean burritos like all
three of the kids love bean burritos but
I figured that I would just you know
make a little a little list of just some
odds and in things that we needed to
pick up so I'm gonna do that I think
that's it not a lot going on tonight I
did not for the ones that I said I was
gonna do shipping today I did not make
it to the post office I was going to but
the line was out the door it was pouring
rain and or Nestor's food would have
gotten cold so I was just like you know
what I think we'll just wait until first
thing tomorrow morning Ali has an
appointment very early in the morning so
he's just gonna go bright when they open
and then he'll go and ship all those off
so they're in the car they're ready to
go it's just yeah he was I was not gonna
make him stand in the freezing cold and
our post office it just sucks because we
only have one post office on this side
of town so it's like everybody goes to
this one so we win earlier this
afternoon and there was a line and then
we went it was almost like the holiday
type of lines which were so amazing I'm
like maybe because of Valentine's
meeting people are melon things out but
goodness so I just wasn't gonna make him
stand in line and I clearly did not want
to stand in line either
so we'll just go first thing in the
morning to ml those off I am so sorry
for the ones that are waiting for your
guys's packages I just hope that guys
Enders I hope I hope I'm so sorry
um but yeah anyways I think that's it I
really think that's all that is going on
right now so I am gonna get back to some
of your guys's messages really quick
while I have a chance and then put my
month stickers in my sticker book
anyways um I will check in with you guys
in a little bit and fill you guys in
with where I'm at I'm not going anywhere
but where I'm at
oh my goodness so excuse the fact that
you hear my kids being kids and being
naughty sorry I don't know why my tripod
it's like leaning sideways I know it
happens to it I swear
so you guys um I set out to do a few
things a few things schedule stuff and
fix my my planner but of course I didn't
get too far because I could not be more
happy to welcome all of you new
subscribers to the channel I hope you
guys enjoy what you're seeing and that
what I share are things that you can put
into life just a quick brief of kind of
what this channel all kind of in tiles
is a lot of everything really um I do I
don't really do so much shopping hauls
and that's just because I mean let's see
I I kind of started off my channels
doing like shopping haul review type
things and then when I started doing my
weight loss journey I thought you know I
think that that's kind of more of the
route I want to take for my channel and
within that time frame
I also started the nutritionist
counseling and then also my trauma
therapy and so I was like you know these
are amazing things that I want to share
and so that's kind of why I geared my
channel a little bit different so it's
not that I will never do shopping hauls
because I will when the time comes
lately and more so
yeah I would say lately so much more my
family and I have been really trying to
stick to budget meaning that really a
lot of like clothes shopping and things
really aren't happening right now
one because my body is changing and I
have so many sets of clothing right now
that I don't see a reason to go buy a
whole bunch I want to go and have a fun
shopping day when I finally grow out of
clothes to the point that it's like fun
to see changes of like major sizes I
would say that I'm just not at a place
in my life where I want to buy a whole
bunch of clothes and do shopping hauls
and things like that so for right now
I'm not doing shopping hauls but I am
still you know I'm doing my weight loss
journey I'm also going through trauma
therapy because just a little back
history
my father had committed suicide when I
was 8 months old I had a mother that was
an addict and I was pretty much grown up
into the system the state system for my
whole life
granted I got to be placed with family
so at least I didn't get placed with
strangers although some of those family
members were strangers to me because
they really didn't know them but at
least they were still family during the
time that I was raised in state care
with some of my family members I endured
physical mental sexual abuse and it kind
of paved my journey for most of my teen
to mid adult life
and then I decided this last year and a
half that I wanted to step out and get
help and so that's when I started
seeking help with in my doctor's care
and finding a counselor that would fit
my benefits and fit my needs
and that's where I'm kind of out right
now is now working on my obesity along
with my eating disorder and all of my
abuse that I endured while I was growing
up and reconnecting with some
relationships that were not healthy at
one time learning to have healthy
relationships and learning how to place
boundaries where they need to be placed
respecting boundaries of others that I'm
not used to having to respect and just
living life you know I am a mother of
three children some know that some don't
because like I said I've got new subs so
I have three children I have a
ten-year-old that's almost 11 I have a
three-year-old that's almost fourth on
Saturday and then I have a two-year-old
that will be three on March 1st so I
have a three and a two year-old that are
like right at 12 months apart almost
within a couple of days they would have
been 11 months apart and I am married to
an amazing man I married him he is from
Egypt and we met online and I traveled
there and we got married and then he
joined me here and we've been married a
long time and it's a great thing and I
decided that I wanted to share my life
journey with YouTube and try and reach
out to people that you know are needing
extra help I've I've went through a lot
and I feel my story is one that could be
shared and told and touch so many other
people out there that might be feeling
alone or feeling like they're the only
ones that have held had things happen to
them that are similar to my story and so
anything that I can share to help others
build their confidence that life isn't
you know what they see it in their own
glass view I will do that
and
I want my journey in life to be
recognised as yes I was a victim at one
time but I am now a survivor and I will
no longer allow my abuse that I endured
during childhood run my life today so
and then with my mother she was pretty
much incarcerated majority of my life
and she recently got out of prison I
want to say three years ago or three and
a half years ago and we are building a
relationship it's it's definitely a work
in progress I wouldn't say that we are
as close as I wish we were I don't think
that me and my mother will ever have
that mother-daughter relationship that I
always desired I think that's just
normal for any child to want that but it
is what it is you know and so we have a
relationship but it's a very what would
you say it's a very basic relationship
so it's a very generic relationship it's
not anything that would be seasoned at
this time so anyways that's a little bit
about me and my channel I just wanted to
kind of share that may think that that's
important because you know like I said
there's a lot of new new faces here that
I just wanted to kind of extend a an
explanation for my channel and why I'm
here and what I'm you know what what my
journey is for and why my channels named
Amy's life journey because my life
journey is one that I want to share so
that I can reach out to so many people
and I know that so many people in this
world walk a world of hurt you know and
I now know that I'm not alone I know
that there are so many people that have
endured the same type of abuse and we
all come out as butterflies but in our
own time and sometimes we feel pressured
to have to gain our wings you know and
go through our our grieving time
differently you know and be
and that's not true I am just now being
able to go through that grieving time I
never grieved the things that I went
through as a child and I'm just now
being able to experience it so it's a
little bit been tough because I'm having
to relive a lot of abuse that I tucked
away and I thought that I would never
have to look at again but I that I
thought that I was over and clearly I
wasn't over it and it was really making
me a different person than I truly truly
am and so as I have been going through
this you know learning experience with
my counselor and learning the different
tools to live life and how to deal with
situations differently and be honest
with myself at times you know if I'm not
ready for certain things I can be honest
you know and say hey you know I
appreciate whatever it is at that time
that I'm going through but you know I'm
just not ready yet and be okay with that
it's okay to say it's not okay learning
how to take time for myself you know I'm
not a person that does that I don't like
putting time for myself I like putting
time for everybody else but I know at
the end of the day the one thing that's
gonna make me stronger is me because I
choose to take time for myself and so
yeah that's that's pretty much cheating
a little chip bag I wanted to read a few
comments I haven't done that for a while
so I thought that would be kind of fun
now I do want to make a just a quick
comment again about this because it was
brought up before and I stated it but I
want to say it again as I'm reading
comments you guys there is not one
comment that brings attention to me more
than another comment that I would choose
certain comments over another comment I
just randomly pick a comment and read it
so please don't feel like just because I
didn't read your comment that it didn't
mean anything to me or that it wasn't
worthy enough to be read on on the video
it was just I just randomly
picking video questions and answering
them or reading a comment that is you
know whatever I mean I don't proofread
them
so unless I've already answered it and
then I sometimes will read it out loud
but um 9 out of 10
I don't proofread the the comments so
there's maybe even a few times that I've
caught in a trouble comment and I'm just
like oh well I'm gonna answer it because
I would have answered it anyways whether
I answer it vocally or answer it through
writing and I'm still trying to keep
caught up on all my messages so just so
if you don't get a message back to me
right away a reply from me I will reply
back it's just been the last couple of
days with the kids being sick and me
trying to change my schedule around and
stuff things have just been a little bit
kind of boo all over the place
but I promise you guys I am definitely
keeping up as much as I can but I
definitely will get back to your comment
no matter what almost
now I'm gonna say one more disclaimer
here because I don't want anybody to
feel like I'm ignoring anybody I just
noticed there's a little tab up here
there's there it says comments and it
shows my comments page then there's
publish published comments held for
review comments and likely spam comments
now I don't have any of my comments set
private or to hold them for review none
of that so there's a zero on that but I
see a number on the likely spam comments
and I thought well what is that so I
clicked into it because again as most of
you guys know I'm so learning the whole
Jeff of all this and YouTube has changed
the layout for me I don't know why but
they did now I can go back and change it
but every time I go out it so goes back
to the new way and rather than keeping
the old way it's like why don't like
change so anyways I seen these numbers
and I was like well what is this so I
clicked into it there was so many
messages on there that I didn't even see
because they went into this different
envelope and I didn't even know they
were there so I published those and then
I don't know if I replied back to him
and then publish it or publish it and
then went back home but I don't know so
if you guys make a comment and I don't
reply back shoot me an email and tell me
to check that because I will forget I
know I'm gonna forget because they don't
I didn't even notice it was there
so please please comment and tell me Amy
I wrote you what just like biker babe
does she'll be like hey Mattie you know
check house because sometimes I'll
forget to check my emails now the phone
that I just got it it's still the same
phone that I've had in the past but it's
just a like a Renu phone or backup phone
or whatever it's called because my other
one went to poops well somehow some of
my notifications are off on this phone
like my snapchat people have snapped me
and they're like you guys are you guys
Amy I've snapped you you're not snapping
me back are you alive are you okay I
won't even see the snaps until I realize
huh I've never gotten to snap in a
couple days I'll go in there and I'll
have like you know 12 to 15 snaps that
people sent me and I didn't even see it
so just know if you snap me and I
haven't replied back just send me an
email or whatever and say hey I snapped
you a couple days ago check it because
I'll forget I'm trying to figure out how
to turn this stupid notification on my
other phone it was just there I didn't
have to push anything but for some
reason because even like my alarm clock
I can't figure out how to get my stupid
alarm clock volume to go up so like
today Maya was a half an hour late to
school because we all slept through it
because I it was going off but it was
vibrating it wasn't giving me the motion
that it was going off oh so yes I just
want to make that clear there is not
anyone that's more personal or perfect
and comments that I would say before
anybody else it's just random and then
these likely spam things I don't even
know about so let's get to this really
quick first one is from Melissa
Andrea Lopez oh I think I know what this
is um can you do a tutorial of what you
use and how you got started
Aimee mmm Melissa what are you Manning
getting started with ma I'm assuming my
vinyl is that what it is if it is I'm
gonna reply back to you so you can
totally answer me on the on the message
um but if that's the thing let me know
and I can totally do one I have no
problem with that if it's even about my
youtube channel let me know I don't mind
one way or the other
I don't I really don't mind but let me
know and then also with that comment
says a kid out I have been interested in
opening a business doing t-shirts for
awhile and didn't know where to start
thank you bye for posting oh that's what
you were talking about alrighty
yes I can definitely do a tutorial about
that I would not have a problem with
that whatsoever so I will make a list of
that and I will do one for sure I don't
have a problem with that
next one chef wannabes life I can't wait
to get my shirt and coffee cup uh-huh
would you please tell me what I owe you
espera oh that girl needs to come do
makeup with em ha ha
so just so you guys know she Chris want
to be Chris want to be chef want to be
aka Chris she has a granddaughter she's
a little bit older than s4 but not by
much um and she's a doll she was at all
I get snaps from her all the time when
she's with her Nona and so yes Nona lets
her granddaughter Amy do her makeup and
it's so beautiful but they would love
doing makeup to YouTube with each other
I'm sure they'd come out looking like
some hot hot girls with a hot mess um
and yes she's one of them that has
snapped me multiple times and I just
don't get back to her because I don't
say that very often anyways yes I will
get to you and I will tell you what it
is
oh right okay I will check that let's
see Carol Josephson I think that plays a
jokes in love the quote about self care
us women really need to remind ourselves
of this so easy for us moms to get lost
in nurturing mode great video beautiful
family Amy oh thank you so much Carol
and I appreciate it and you're a hundred
percent right I think as women and moms
we are just I think we're kind of molded
that way we're just engineered that way
so for us it's always about giving and
that's kind of what I was saying earlier
is I just sometimes will forget you know
to take care of myself
and by the time it's done for the day
it's like oh so yes thank you for that
comment
and thank you so much about making the
comment about my family I think they're
beautiful too I love them they can be
some hot turds sometimes but I still
love them they can be my hot turds thank
you so much sweetheart um Jennifer why
why do we have lost names I can't read I
can not pronounce so then I'm like
butchering the name Jennifer saqqara I
really don't know if I just butchered
that but we're gonna go with that mrs.
Amy by a chance is that book on Amazon
yes it is and I was supposed to put the
link in it today and I completely forgot
um but it is on Amazon and I will try my
hardest to remember to put the link in
my subscription box my description box
if I can say it right
when I load this tomorrow because I'll
forget I know I will but I'll remember
I'll try anyways okay um let's see
shoot the your daughter is
beautiful awesome video thank you so
much I really really really really
appreciate it
I really appreciate you both both of you
you guys are awesome and you guys have
helped me in some very dark days that I
have had you guys have been a very big
help to me and I just want to say thank
you once again you guys are amazing
um so let's see did you do doo doo doo
doo doo doo
Lisa R key hi Amy new sub here from
shoot the I messaged you back but I
just wanted to say thank you and welcome
I am so happy to have you here along
with all of your other subbies that come
from that channel you guys are amazing
and I appreciate so much that you guys
have come to join me I just hope I don't
let you guys down because sometimes I
think she shoot the shoot shoot shoot
the chick to be really good ones
Deborah D Lee family life hi sub to you
from shoot the channel been on
their channels since they started love
your channel Oh welcome that one just
came in two minutes ago
welcome so much I am so happy to have
you here as well with so many more
amazing subbies that came from your
guys's channel i just appreciate it
and again Pam and Rikki I really really
really do appreciate all that you guys
have done and shared with about my
channel to your guys's subs I really
appreciate it you guys are amazing and I
couldn't be more happier to have so many
amazing new people here along with all
the ones that have been here from the
beginning on out you guys are all so
amazing mean everything to me and my
family
and I could not think of a better way to
be growing my channel everybody that I
have here are
so amazing and sometimes you know I get
teary-eyed and I get emotional because I
just you guys have touched me in so many
ways and you guys have all helped me out
and so many use so many ways more than
you guys would ever even know and I give
messages all the time about how I help
people out in their days that they've
needed help and it goes the same with me
I could not imagine sometimes getting
through days without having you guys
there to share it with and so I
definitely just want to say thank you so
much and it means the world to me to
have each and every one of you guys here
and I mean them from the bottom of my
heart I love absolutely every one of you
guys and I just couldn't imagine having
a my channel I couldn't imagine not
having it it is something that I've
always dreamed about but I never put the
trust in myself that I can do it and
finally once I made that step and
listened to my husband and did it I
would never think of anything different
I love you guys and I appreciate you
guys so much and for all that you guys
have done for me I couldn't say thank
you enough and so yeah it's definitely
amazing feeling to have um I am going to
read our daily our daily daily book you
guys I need to get a bookmark seriously
I keep saying that and then I just don't
do it
okay so resist the urge to fill every
minute of your weekend with stuff
downtime is necessary for the health of
your mind body and soul and I really
think that goes into finding time for
yourself it's the same thing you're
gonna have to take time no matter what
don't always have something on the
agenda and that's why this came to light
for me right here this this came to
light for me so that I can make time for
myself so that
every day there's something on the
schedule but it's not every day filled
with stuff like you know Sunday oh
that's on the agenda is all he has his
day out I need to stay at home and rest
and relax and I do my sit down video on
that day so I'm just resting and having
a comfort day you know Monday there's
not a whole lot to it I have counseling
ODS and and things that we got to do and
then I'm vlogging while I'm doing those
things and it's my shipping day which
yeah I told you guys earlier I didn't
make it to the post office and all he
went out tonight to go and get our
dinner and he's like Amy it's snowing
pretty heavy I'm like oh no so I don't
know again you guys I will keep you guys
updated for the ones that are waiting
for packages I will definitely keep you
guys updated I just personally don't
want to go out when it's snowing in our
family does not drive because there was
at one point we were out driving this is
when we had our other car and there was
a dumb dumb driver that didn't clearly
know how to drive in the snow that he
decided to pull on the side of the road
on the wrong side of the road to pull
back out from the wrong side of the road
right smack in front of my husband all
he was trying to slam on his brakes but
of course we're in snow and ice so what
do you think is gonna happen we're gonna
go sliding and fishtailing and bam we
hit the backsides of our cars together
and whose fault it end up being ours
because we're the ones trying to go
around him because he was pulling out
into traffic from nowhere and so it just
came into this big ol thing that we made
an agreement me and all he did that
anytime it's snowing we will not be on
the road because we don't want to first
risk our lives our kids lives or risk
our car we don't we don't need another
car we just got a new car last year from
a me thrashing another one so yeah we
don't need another car um so yeah I'll
keep you guys updated on the ones
waiting for packages I will let you guys
know exactly what's going on updating
everything but just remember you don't
always have to have things on this
calendar to fill your time take time for
yourself get some hot tea or hot coffee
sit down with a book and just
read take some sweet time for yourself
because you all deserve it anyways I'm
gonna close because I am going to jump
in the shower my nose is all stuffy now
I'm gonna jump into the shower because I
want to take a shower tonight and then
I'm gonna get my babies off to bed and
take my meds and then it going no noise
myself so I will check in with you guys
tomorrow bright and shiny in the morning
I think Oh tomorrow sets it down video
so you might get a video with me and
Ollie tomorrow we'll see either way I
will check in with you guys at some
point tomorrow
but you guys I hope have a wonderful
evening I hope you guys enjoyed my vlog
today and enjoyed seeing a little bit of
snow falling from the sky
until then sweet dreams you guys bye bye
